Chapter 5207: What Is Pain?
“Burying a lover is worse than being betrayed.” Li Qiye said: “Being betrayed meant that the love was unworthy in the first place, no need to mourn. The loss of true love can bring a man down.”
“Yes.” The man pondered before nodding his head.
“Now let’s take it up another level. The feeling of helplessness despite possessing the ability to prevent it.” Li Qiye smiled.
“Elaborate.” The man stared at Li Qiye.
“Death is horrifying. A lover’s death is even worse. However, what if you have the ability to revive her?” Li Qiye said.
“Revive her.” The man repeated.
“If someone has this ability, they do not deserve the love.” Li Qiye said.
“Why is that?” The man asked.
“You wouldn’t be seeing the bun anymore.” As Li Qiye was speaking, he stuffed the remaining bun into his mouth.
After he finished chewing, he elaborated: “You would have eaten her long ago since you wouldn’t have been yourself. Now, as you move forward, you will continue to suffer. Betrayal is only a ripple in comparison.”
The man took his time before answering: “You are right, but everyone has their own trauma, a heart demon that can’t be overcome.”
“That’s not surprising. The favorite son of the heaven is blessed. Even when you lose it all, you’ll start from the same place as everyone else.” Li Qiye smiled.
“Blessed, you say?” The man sighed and looked at the sky.
“Is the dao truly that lonely?” He eventually asked.
“That depends on how far you can go and what you are searching for. For example, a rich mortal will think that everyone is drawn to their wealth. An authoritative figure will share the same belief. It’s just a matter of perception since the only constant is the human heart. If someone is with you not for wealth or power, they are definitely principled, destined to go farther than others. But ultimately, the end path seems lonely for them as well.” Li Qiye said.
“Why can’t two walk together?” The man asked.
“It’s not impossible.” Li Qiye said: “You might be able to find a companion along the way. Alas, the path is endless so even the slightest difference, no matter how insignificant, will lead to a divergence spanning thousands of miles.”
“People come for resources and power.” Li Qiye said: “It is what it is, don’t place too much hope in people but if you want to do so, you must uphold your dao heart first.”
“My dao heart.” He said softly.
“If you want to protect for love, then do it. As for what the lover does, that’s her problem. For example, if you like an insect and wish to protect it, you shouldn’t impose on what it does.” Li Qiye said.
“A lover is different from an insect.” The man shook his head.
“When your dao heart reaches a level capable of reaching the apex, your lover, your world, and everything else are no different from insects. You should only do what you want to do or what you believe you should do. Your heart is unaffected by anything else.” Li Qiye said.
“Sounds pointless.” The man disagreed.
“It’s a fallacy for arrogant emperors and cultivators.” Li Qiye said: “If you protect others but expect them to praise and repay you, then your original intention is not protection, it is merely seeking affirmation, a matter of ego. When you protect for the sake of protecting, praises and insults no longer matter. They are nothing and you can do as you wish, this includes ignoring them.”
“The way you put it, it sounds like my dao heart is not firm enough.” The man smiled wryly while his eyes sparkled with a hint of pain.
“Pain starts with perception and emotion. Because you love, you also suffer. If you grow numb enough, you won’t be able to perceive pain to a certain extent.” Li Qiye looked into his eyes.
“That I understand. Numbness is the only coping mechanism for certain experiences.” The man nodded.
“There is a limit to this, how long can one remain numb?” Li Qiye said.
“When they lose it all, as you said earlier.” The man said.
“It is clear that nothing can be preserved forever. What must one do at this realization?” Li Qiye asked.
“I don’t know.” The man sighed.
“There are two choices to make then, either face it directly and try to endure or fall, whether it be through numbness or self-destruction. Which will you pick?” Li Qiye asked.
The man didn’t answer and stared at the bun in his hand.
Li Qiye took another bun out of the broken bowl and ate slowly. After one bite, he said: “The heart can’t be understood so easily. Now, there are people who would throw you a bun or a few coins but if your bowl is filled with coins and buns, these same people would ask you for help or express disgust.”
He paused for a moment before continuing: “Is it because they have changed? No, they’re still them. It’s just that good or evil, love or hatred, it all arises from a single thought, a reflection of the human heart at that point in time.”
“Hmm…” The man looked up in the sky and pondered carefully.
“The fallen ones certainly loved the world once; some had protected it. Those who have loved you can stop loving you, and those who hate you now may have loved you at one point.” Li Qiye said.
“Or love something else.” The man said.
“Again, a fallacy of self-righteous people.” Li Qiye couldn’t help but laugh: “Why do people think that love must be selfless or an act of sacrifice? Can a wealthy man not receive true love? Only a beggar can? No, love is conditional. Why would someone insist on loving a penniless lad? Would you love a woman who is unbelievably ugly?”
“That is the mind of the common people.” The man smiled wryly.
“Does a powerful cultivator transcend this belief? No, their heart is the same. They pick incredible merit laws over ordinary ones. They prefer the strongest weapons instead of tree branches. When you stand at the apex, would you pick an epoch weapon or a branch?” Li Qiye asked.
“Everyone would pick the epoch weapon.” The man said.
“Is that right? Those at the apex will still pick the most ordinary choices. Why fault the insects who would also do the same? Accept it for this is a fact of life.” Li Qiye smiled.
“Sir, seems like I was mistaken, I’ve tried to enlighten others without first enlightening myself.” The man sighed.
“Yes, reflect on yourself first to improve your dao heart, this will enable you to go further.” Li Qiye said.
“Myself.” The man glanced at the sky again.